Mother's Day

I have had an intense love/hate relationship with Mother’s Day over the past five years. While I have been grateful for the wonderful motherly figures in my life, I have ached with the desire to be a mother myself.

In the past five years, I have gained two baby boxes which now sit on a shelf together filled with memories. I have gone through labor and delivery twice, but that is the extent of my motherhood experience thus far.

“And all they who have mourned shall be comforted.” D&C 101:14

This year will be the first year I cry happy tears along with the sad. This year, while remembering my losses, my husband and I will also be lucky enough to celebrate the new life, and new opportunity, we have been given. We have experienced a lot of pain and sadness the past four years over children, but we have also been blessed with peace and comfort to carry us through, and we are just as grateful for those tender mercies as we are for this child.

“Sing unto the Lord; for he hath done excellent things.” Isaiah 12:5

Even though I have joy this Mother’s Day, there are many women, women I know and many more I don’t, who still dread this holiday. Sister Patricia Holland once said, “I believe mother is one of those very carefully chosen words, one of those rich words—with meaning after meaning after meaning. We must not, at all costs, let that word divide us. I believe with all my heart that it is first and foremost a statement about our nature, not a head count of our children."

Of course, there are more reasons than one to mourn on Mother's Day. Whatever the reason for someone's pain this day, my heart goes out to them. 

If you are one who suffers on this day, I hope you find peace, comfort, and happiness sooner than later and that you, too, will feel joy on this day.